Jenniejenmarie's Blog

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set to self destruct August 19, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — jenniejenmarie @ 4:21 am

The trap I set for you seems to have caught my leg instead.

 

i’m so confused. i wish someone would just come up to me and say: “JENNIE, what the fuck are you doing? Like seriously, what are you doing with your life and your thoughts and your choices?” Also, if this person would proceed to tell me what I’m doing with my life, thoughts, and choices I would really appreciate that.

Man, I make poor choices. Poor, poor, poooooorrr choices. I swear I’m set to self destruct. I know the things I’m doing are fucking stupid, but I just keep falling into this muck and I keep being an asshole. Oof, I guess you can’t control the things that you are good at. Maybe I shouldn’t worry so much-actually, I know I shouldn’t worry so much. Maybe, I should just work on my life/life choices/future life choices. Maybe, I just don’t give a shit anymore. I say run my stupid life into the ground might as well.

This is a good time to retreat, to nerd out, to read books and stay in. RETREAT.

Ugh, do I have to be so craven all the time?

in retrospect, I’m often too hard on myself. I’m my own biggest critic. so unhappy with how I am sometimes. I mean, I know I’m a regular badass and all that business, but sometimes I start to doubt. I doubt that I am great, that I do the right things (ever), I doubt that I will ever figure things out, I ultimately just worry too fucking much. Fuck it. If these people don’t like me then I am sure that some person, somewhere, at some other time probably will.

Learning life lessons mother fucks. Starting with talking like a lady…